Breaking Bad (Habits)?

On this episode of the Red Lips Real Talk Podcast, hosts Jasmine, Jessica, Monica, Maritza, and Deibys dive into James Clear's book Atomic Habits and how it’s made an impact on their lives. They open up about their own journeys with building good habits and breaking bad ones, sharing both their successes and struggles along the way. They explore key ideas from the book, like habit stacking, triggers, cravings, responses, and rewards. The hosts discuss how even small habits can spark big changes, touching on everything from health and personal growth to cultural expectations, like the decision to grow out or cut hair. They highlight the importance of shaping your environment to support new habits and give a sneak peek into their next book club pick, There Was a Little Girl by Brooke Shields. The conversation is all about inspiring listeners to make positive changes in their own lives.

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Transcript

Hey, chicas, welcome to Red Lips Real Talk Podcast. I'm Jasmine. I'm Jessica. I'm Monica. I'm Maritza. And I'm Deibys with a Y. Get ready, somos latinas from South Florida, bringing you real talk on life, love, and everything in between. Time to get real. Welcome back, ladies. Hey, hey there. Hello. How's everybody doing today? 

Good. I miss you, lady. I always miss you guys. Yeah, we're going to say ladies today we're going to be discussing an amazing book, which actually remember, ladies, we talked about it on our. first show of January 1st. It was our giveaway. Yes, it was. Uh, what was her name again? The lady who won? Sandra. Sandra. 

Sandra, if you're listening, today's show is about atomic habits. Yay, Sandra. Which, by the way, we are starting a red lips This is the first book and then we will announce at the end of the show what the next book is if you would like to join our virtual book club. But Atomic Habits is written by James Clear and his tiny changes and remarkable results. 

An easy and proven way to build good habits and break bad ones. And God knows I'm full of bad stuff. 

I need, I need, I need to change. We need some help. I need to change my evil ways. How many times do you have to read the book do you think? Well listen, first of all, I started reading the book, I'm going to be honest, like I'm not really into self help books and if there's anybody at this table who should be obsessed with self help books. 

It's me. You've said that before, that you're not into it. I'm just, I'm not that girl, but I really was mesmerized. I'm being, no, I'm being honest. Like the way Are you being for real? No, for real. For real? For real. For real. Like, you know, this is real talk. So for real? No, for real. Because I was like, oh my God, like this guy was hit with a baseball. 

All bad and like everything that I don't want to ruin the book too much. But that like really was like that whole, what do you call it? The prelog, prelog, prolog. I was like, I was captivated by that, you know, and it was very inspirational to me. Do you feel the same way? I do. I mean, I've read the book a couple of times. 

A couple of times. A couple and then a couple and then a couple more. I, well, I had to stop reading the book after I started listening to the audio, audio, um, Audible. Okay, so how, how did you, what was your take on the audio compared to reading the book? I think the book is better because his, it's, well actually I believe it's James Clear that actually does it. 

It is. It is. And his voice. I think you should always get an actor. Or somebody with it. You think? Oh, yeah. I actually appreciate it when it's the actual writer. Well, I thought his voice was good, though. I was actually impressed. I thought his voice was good for him to be the author. I need, like, Matthew McConaughey. 

Like, you might start a bad habit if he's reading it. No, no, no. No, but like, at night, listening, I'll be like All right, all right, I'm sorry, James Clear, if you're listening to this, but it's like, all right, let's get rid of them, but you know, these books, self help or whatever you want to call them, the author narrates, you know, you want them to see, I do too. 

I read another book. Me estaba quedando dormida en el carro. I was like. But if it was Matthew McConaughey, like, all right, let's get rid of them bad habits. I see that, but I really thought, I was really impressed by his voice where I was like, cause I listened to a lot of audibles and I was like, okay, the author's the one that's going to read it. 

Let's see how this goes. And then he started reading. I was like, his voice is good and it's not bad. I was listening to it, but the thing I think is like, the book is not like a story, story, story. So there's nothing to keep you like engaged other than just like you're intrigued by what he's saying and you're learning from it. 

So I think, I think the book is excellent. And for it being a self help book, I know, and I'm being sincere because I know I can be very like sarcastic, but I feel like this is a book that really can impact your life in a positive way. All of us have neutral habits, like he says, right? So, if you are listeners, what does she mean by neutral habits? 

Well, you wake up in the morning. Automatic. Typically, you maybe go to the bathroom. Uh, brush your teeth or take a shower. Or maybe, maybe somebody wakes up and the first thing they do is light a cigarette. Wouldn't you consider that a bad habit? Yeah, there's all habits, right? So, he's basically saying the neutral habits are the stuff that you do without thinking. 

Automatic. But maybe you wake up in the morning without thinking and the first thing to do is smoke a cigarette. So he's just basically trying to help you like differentiate what's a neutral habit, what are your good habits, what are your bad habits, and how to incorporate tiny changes to lead to really huge changes. 

That was my takeaway. Yeah, that's that's what I took away from it too and I think it's a good book to like, um, Jessica, I know you said you have given it a way, you gifted it a lot. And I think that that's awesome that you've given it so many, to so many people. I think it's a good gift as a self help book because it doesn't give you that like feeling of when somebody gives you this self help book where you're like, okay, well, what's wrong with me? 

Why are you giving me a self help book? Are you, are you hinting something? Oh my God. That could totally be offensive. It's true. It's true. Or you think I'm sad. I need help. Or you think, you know, I have motivation, but it could be so many. Yes, but Jessica gave me a book. Estrogen matters, girl. We're in the menopause journey together. 

Okay. I would say, thanks. 

Estrogen matters. Thank you, Jessica. I wanted to see what her, uh, her, uh, expression would be. Listen, I was not offended because I'm going through it. We're in the same journey. We're in the same boat. Yes. We're in the, we're in the perimetopause boat. You know, that's for another podcast. It is. So stay tuned. 

We'll have books for that. We'll have books for that. Absolutely. But if you don't, I'm sorry, Jess, go ahead. It's true what, uh, Deibys was saying. I think it's a good. book to be gifted without it coming across like personal or judgmental because you're like exactly what Jasmine was saying, it's like who doesn't want to improve on their habits or work on bad habits. 

So yeah, I feel like this is a great book to kind of give you a different perspective on habits because what my takeaway, one of my takeaways, because this book for me has had a lot of takeaways because I've actually read it in different times of my life. And actually one of, the second time that I had read it was from a book club also, another book club. 

And, um, and to me, one of the takeaways is how to look at your habits as like systems that you've created. Some of them automatic, like when you get out of bed, like just little things that you know you automatically do to help you improve, not necessarily, and some of them may not be helpful. Like Jasmine had mentioned, like waking up and smoking a cigarette. 

Yeah. Like, and then being able to then evaluate those systems and how you can tweak them. Right. When he discusses, like for me, like his, one of my favorite parts in the book, he discusses like habit stacking and, you know, we can get into all that. Like those are like my, and then he discusses like in chapter six, he talks about like motivation is overrated. 

Oh yeah. I'm a big believer in that. Like, yeah. I think motivation can. help you start, but I don't think it's going to carry you through. No, I don't. Because I mean, you can only rely on motivation so much where really it's about getting it done and even not focusing on the result, but focusing on what are the systems with, what are the steps within those big steps that are getting you to where. 

You want to go. Well, I'm going to, I'm going to jump in here because I like to, I think when people get overwhelmed, like with all these big changes that you have to do and he's like, but just stay disciplined. So for example, let's say you're the type of person who wants to, uh, start incorporating 20 pushups a day. 

Right. And you're like, okay, I'm going to do 20 pushups a day. But you can't just say it like that. You have to say after I brush, this is just an example, right after I brush my teeth, that's when I'm going to do the 20 push ups. And then you brush your teeth, boom, you do the 20 push ups and that's it. You have to have like an order to it because if you just randomly say, I'm going to do 20 push ups. 

And then you end up not kind of doing them. Yeah, he even says, like, you don't have to do even 20. Do two push ups. Yes. Yeah. It's about creating the habit of, okay, like you said, after you brush your teeth, I'm going to do a push up, two push ups. And you start creating this habit where it becomes, like, natural to you, like how you brush your teeth. 

Like, things incorporating it like that. Yeah, he was big on Very good point. Fall in love with the process The process. of who you want to ultimately become. And he also said that your old identity can sabotage the new life or change that you want for yourself. And it's human nature, like you are who you are. 

But if you don't want to be that person anymore, you have to let go of certain things in order to lead you to what it is that ultimately you want. And it's, it's difficult. That's very difficult for a lot of people to do. Do you think that that correlates with like that saying that says fake it till you make it? 

What do you guys think about that? I love fake it I think, yeah. Because I'm delusional. Okay. Because he says it like, if you want to be a runner, okay, when you're doing certain things you got to think, well, what would, what would a runner do? Like what, what steps does a runner do in their habits to then make them a runner? 

They're not a runner just because, oh, they run, they run, oh, they ran a marathon. No, what habits do they create every day? Like maybe somebody says, well, as soon as I get home from work and I take off my shoes, I'm going to put my running shoes on, even though that might not be that you're running like right at that second, but you're like, okay, I'm going to prepare. 

You create certain steps to the cues, the cues, you prepare for the action, exactly. Yeah. And you're not focusing on the results. Yeah. So I have to say like, you know, and I'm going to go there for the last year, I want to say even maybe a little bit over a year, I've struggled a lot with, uh, you know, I've shared it with you guys, like I'm in the perimenopause boat, right? 

And for me, motivation, like losing my mojo has been like an up and down rollercoaster. And this help, this book has significantly helped me because. I was, and always have, you guys know, um, you guys have known me like almost all my life, where I've enjoyed, I do enjoy working out, it is my de stressor, I don't do it for the other benefits that you do get from it, which is, hey look, you know, losing weight, whatever have you, really I don't, I do it because it's my thing. 

It's my thing. venting, my letting go, my de stressor, it's where I think, it's therapeutic for me. And I've really struggled a lot in this area. But I've made it a point where before it wasn't about like, I need to get an hour of workout in. It has to be an hour. No, that is no longer for me. I had to Accept the fact, and especially, I'm a mom now, like, my life has significantly changed. 

But it is my self care time, and I had to bottle it down to like, today's gonna be 15 minutes. And that 15 minutes, I wouldn't even focus so much on the time, it's I put my clothes ready, my shoes here, um, I have all my equipment, I know da da da da, my nighttime routine is set up so then that way I'm, my morning routine looks a certain way, and this hour, but it's not about anymore how long am I gonna work out. 

It's not even about like what work am I gonna do. I kind of know already. But it was about like I have to this has to happen and getting myself ready for the action of it And it's like it looks like this putting this here putting that there my sneakers here my workout clothes my towel the gym I mean you guys know like I'm building a gym here at my house Like these are things because I have to create my environment around me yeah, make that happen because it is vital and my point to that is It's a vital component of my well being and I've had to change it, but I've had to change my environment in order for it to happen. 

And it's not about the result. It's about like, it's not even about the time. It's I'm showing up for me and this is how I'm going to make it happen to show up. Yeah. You know, and I'm going to piggyback off of that since you were, you brought up health. He, he brought up health too as an example. And he said here, you may want better health, but if you continue to prioritize comfort over accomplishment, you will be drawn to relaxing instead of training. 

And that I'm, I'm, I remember writing that down cause I'm like, how many of us do that? How many of us, you know, we have the intent. And we're like, I need to do this, but then we, we just end up sabotaging ourselves. It's self sabotage. Absolutely. I like that of the book. And the book is pretty much like that throughout the whole thing. 

But he also talks about habit stacking, which is a very unique thing. Um, there's one story he shared in the book about the ice cube. And I really like that story a lot and basically he said, you know, if you're sitting in a cold room, right, you're, you're freezing and you're wearing your winter clothing and it's 21 degrees and you put a piece of ice on the table, uh, the ice doesn't melt. 

You know, and you're still freezing, and now it goes to 21, 22, 23, 24. You're still freezing, and the ice is still not melting. But right when you get to 33, I believe, it starts to melt, but you're still cold. You're still freezing, but the ice started to melt. That 1 percent was, was enough for that piece of ice to just drastically start to create a change, create a change, but you don't see the change because you're still cold. 

But imagine now it gets to 34, 35, it's eventually going to become a puddle of water. And you're going to be hot and you're going to now be wearing flip flops and shorts and that's what he's basically saying. Like that, those tiny little changes will end up leading to significant, huge, massive changes in your life. 

So don't look at it from like, you know, that's never going to happen. It's unattainable. Oh, it is so attainable. Because you look at the big picture and it becomes overwhelming. I know that happens to me. It happens to me. I have tried and I do remind myself, it doesn't always happen, but I do remind myself like, Hey, Jay, like, you know what, focus, celebrate the little small things that you did accomplish. 

Hey, I got a 15 minute workout today. And honestly, looking back, I've been able to accomplish that much better and be more consistent about it than when I've created like bigger, like getting that one hour workout. That was also for a different time in my life. I'm content with what I got going on and, and I tweak it all the time. 

Like for instance, and, and I think like simple habits too that create an environment for me. Like, I don't know if you guys want to share like little things that you do that are automatic, but like mean a lot. Like for me, honestly, this is so simple. I love making my bed first thing in the morning. I love it. 

It makes me feel like I'm ready for the day. My room is organized. There's something about like my brain that's like, it's funny that there's a study that shows that it's that you should make your bed when you first wake up in the morning because you're already madically triggered that you've accomplished something. 

You're starting your day off. Good point. And my husband loves. When the bed is made in the morning. Yeah. And there's times I just don't have time. So like if he gets home before me and the bed's not made, he doesn't say anything, but it's like a joke. So then when he gets home and the bed's made because he leaves before me, Oh, okay. 

Okay. You know, he'll make like a little comment from upstairs or like, I know that he will be like, I made the bed for you today. Like, you know, but it does feel good. I feel it. When I have that minute to do it in the morning, it does feel good. It's like the simplest thing. Families. Yeah. Because I make my bed every morning, too. 

I love doing it. I make my bed sometimes with my husband in it. So he just has to make that one side. I tuck him in it. He's like, and he laughs and I crack up and it's like a good early laugh and he's like, Babe, I'm still in the bed. You be like, I'm still in the bed. I'm like, I have to, I have to, I have to. 

That's hilarious. But I love that. It's like, it's like what you said. It's a good feeling. It is a good thing. And the thing that Jasmine was just saying about the ice cube, it's where he says just 1 percent better each day. Oh yeah. That's like quick point of the eyes. It's like, it's just that one little percent just Every day just That's why I like the book because I don't like to use the terminology dumb it down, but he really It's an easy read. 

It's an easy read. It makes sense though. It makes sense. It's inspirational. And you could actually do it. Yeah. The things he says, you can, you can do. It's not like this like crazy book where I have to create this whole like thing and change everything. It's like Little steps, incorporating habits, how to break old habits, how So is there anything in particular that you all want to share that maybe you've incorporated or maybe started or it's motivated to you to like, Hey, I want to implement this system for this particular habit that I want to change or implement. 

Gosh, I mean, I'm going to keep it real, like, I've become a little bit more diligent with our podcast. I see. And I'm trying to put a lot like, you know, I always horse around and I say I'm delusional, but I just feel like if I continue to be as passionate as I was, you know, on our first dinner when we were talking about it. 

And I, and I don't lose that passion and I continue to, you know, set the appointments, find people to interview, um, get educated on things that I'm not educated on, have the passion, have put in the work. It has to lead to success. So I'm answering your question. That's what I'm doing, that I'm trying to believe in this so much. 

to get to that endgame. I see it. I see it, Jay. You got a little fire under your ass. Yeah. That's a good thing. And I feel like the book was, in certain parts of the book, it was, illuminated something in your life. I do. I really do. And In my personal life, you know, my daughter's already in college. I'm in a different stage with my, thank God, I'm in a great place with, um, I'm going to say my husband's name because he gave me permission. 

I'm so excited. But, um, I was talking to Mike. And, uh, he's like, I see it, babe. I see, I see it. You're, you, you got that little passion. You're, your friends are, like, all of you ladies are really in this. It's a beautiful thing to see. Yeah. So that's, that's, keep it real. Yeah. I know. Thank you for sharing that. 

I see it. I see the fire. Monica, you've read the book, like, how many times yourself? Oh, I've only read it twice. Oh, that's right. I've only read it twice. Well, so what did you get out of it? I, I just recently listened to it and I'm like ready to hear it again. So it's like, well, how have you used it since you've read it a couple of times? 

Like anything in particular that you've implemented in your life that you've seen at work and well, yeah, I've tried several times implementing different habits. Um, but like he says, it's, it's hard for your book reading. Well, yeah, that's definitely, you've been reading more. Yeah. And we're not going to talk about what I read. 

We are not going to talk about what we read. You have been reading books. Well she's giving me a book about fucking estrogen. And Monica's giving me a book about ffff. They're good books. I don't know what you're talking about. What is happening? We're in our menopause journey. This is a different stage in our life. 

It is. No, I love it. Don't get me wrong. I love it. I don't want to live in real life anymore. I want fantasy. Oh, no, no. Take it. Take it. Reading has definitely been one because now, like, I have a lot of books in a different room. So, to get to that point of where I'm going to read, like how he says, put the book where you see it, that's what I've been doing, so I know, okay, that's great. 

Hey, you want to watch something? No, I'm going to go read. So, do you have a reading room? Because Deibys and I have, we have a fantasy about our library room. Yeah, we have a library we want to build. Yeah, we do. With a ladder. You guys have made me like a reader because I've never really, I mean, when I was a young girl, I was really into like vampire books and Stephen King or I was reading all the time, but then I just stopped reading. 

You know, I was into like vampires book and Frankenstein and Anne Rice was huge for me. My gosh, I read, uh, I don't know if you guys remember The Babysitter's Club. Yeah. Nancy Drew. I used to read those. I stopped reading when I had my daughters. I think I was just like In mom mode. Yeah. And then I just. 

Yeah, I could see that. I just kind of was like. It's hard. It's hard for me to do that now. 30s. I was just like, I don't got time for this. Yeah, I get you. But then you guys brought me back into the reading world and, uh, I have to tell you, I'm really enjoying it. Oh my gosh. Do you guys remember? Oh my gosh. 

Who's the writer to the book about your menstrual cycle when we were kids? There is a book. No, I don't know. They made it into a movie. I'm sure our audience knows, Margaret, you don't remember that Jay? When we were in, it was, I read it when I was like 12. I don't remember reading it, but I remember the movie that came out. 

God, um, God, I'm here. I'm Mar something like that. Yes, it talks about your period. Yes. It's a story. I don't remember exactly, but I remember enjoying that book. And it was like the only book, I mean, come on, like. I don't know about you guys, but like, my mom really didn't. No. Are you there, God? It's me, Margaret. 

I knew it. I'm sorry, I got the name wrong. The Judy Blume! The Judy Blume books. Yeah. Yes. I love that. Escalastics was huge in school. Like, well, you know, if you got The troll books. You know you troll books. You know you were a rich kid when you bought like all the books. I know. They still have those though. 

My kids just had a book fair. I think I only ordered one book because I couldn't afford it. I was at the library, bro. And my mom would be like, tú biblioteca, and I was like, ay, mami, please, everybody buys books. And my mom was like, tú and I was like, it's for my brain. No, and then, so you ordered the book. 

You order the books, then it would come to the classroom. The teacher would hand it out, well, our teacher would line it up in front of the blackboard. And then she would call the student's name and they would grab their book. And I would just like look at everybody like, oh, lucky you. They're going home with a new, a new book. 

They still do it now, but it's like the book fan. I'm so happy for you. Meanwhile, I'm like. I'm like, yeah, really? Meanwhile, we wanted books back then. Now, our kids growing up, it was, they would, you give them money for books and they'll come home with junk. Yeah. It was constant junk. No, but I appreciate that, ladies, that you've brought me back into the world of reading. 

Like, I'm being sincere because I feel like even in reading Atomic Habits, Like, it's, it's, it's like, recharged me. Yes. In a right, in the, in a good way. So glad. So glad. I love that. And I love the little book club that we got going on. Yeah. I love that. I like it too. No. All right. So, Monica, tell me, what did you get out of the book? 

Oh, yeah. Back to me. Basically, what everyone said, it's, you know, you take these little habits and you try to improve. Like, I, I like when he says, like, if you're trying to, let's see. Lose weight, right? So you don't say, Oh, I want to lose weight. It's more like, I want to be, or I am a healthy person. So you start making healthier choices. 

And, you know, you, you rephrase it that way, like how we said before, like I get to instead of I have to. Right, right, right. Start rephrasing those things. Yes. And your mind is gonna. Yeah. You know, change it for you as well. Like you're gonna just fall into that habit slowly but surely. Yeah. Well, he said that the habit has to become, he said the habit has to become a part of your identity. 

Identity. I remember he said that. And sometimes it's hard, though, for people to, to change their identity in that point, you know? So, yeah, it's, it's simple as far as, um, the little tips that he's giving us. They're very simple and easy to do. They're very simple. And you can do it. everyday life. It's not like, you know, you're gonna make massive, um, disruptions to your life the way that he's saying to do it. 

But for some people, it's kind of hard to just like, you know, Yeah, because you have to unlearn bad habits, right? It's the journey. And, you know, I know that journey is like the most overused word, but it is a journey. Like, like, it could be a simple thing. Like, listen, I'm going to wake up in the morning and I'm not going to take a shower. 

I'm going to put on a workout outfit. Because I'm going to go to the gym, right? So I'll take a shower after the gym, and instead of smoking a cigarette, I'm going to put a nicotine patch on, and or I'm going to go for a brisk walk. Like, I have to do that because this is killing me. The cigarettes are killing me. 

If I don't lose weight, I'm subjectable more to cardiovascular disease. I mean, we're getting older. These are things that are actually happening. You know, so those are the type of changes you need to make because you need to look at the bigger picture. Like, do you want better health? Do you want to be agile when you're 80 years old? 

You know, or do you want to be on a walker? Like you have to put in the work now so that doesn't happen to you. Because I know people that are elderly that kind of, you know, didn't exercise and didn't take care of themselves. And now they're like, not really able to move. And I'm like, I don't want that to happen to me. 

So, what can I do today to be an 80 year old woman that can walk very well, move her arms, and is still semi agile? I have to put in the work now. Yeah. You know? I agree with that. I think, like, I'm, I've shared with you ladies, I honestly don't, this is probably the first time I'm talking about it, like, publicly, but you guys know I stopped drinking. 

It's been January was a year on my one year anniversary. I did stop drinking. Um, I Wasn't and I call myself Honestly, I'm I'm not a drinker and I've actually Enforced that within myself Because I want to identify, I don't know what five years will bring, I don't know what next year is going to bring. I know right now I'm not a drinker and I've done it and you guys know why. 

Again, going back to that beautiful perimenopause boat ride that I'm on, I've honestly did it because of that. And because, you know, for 15 years I took care of people who have Alzheimer's, dementia, and I was having a lot of cognitive changes within my perimenopause journey that were significantly concerning to me that it was actually causing me to become depressed and having panic attacks because I thought I was becoming non functional to that point. 

Jess, I didn't know it was like that. Yeah. So with that said, it took me on a ride that I had a huge reality check and I really had to come to terms with saying to myself, this is not worth it for me. And I am going to be 50 and how, like you had said, Jasmine, how do I plan to spend the rest of my years? 

I'm also a mom to young toddlers and I want to be fully functioning and I've made it, you know, my lifestyle to be the best that I can be. And this is an area that I was struggling with, and I've never considered myself, I'm not an alcoholic, so please don't take this out of context, I'm not an alcoholic, I do have alcoholism in my family, and I've seen it do a lot of detrimental things to people, so that has always been in the back of my head, and, uh, I really want to live with it. 

a very thriving life. So whatever I need to let go of, and I had to really come to terms with that and just decide. And, you know, it's hard when it's a social component because, you know, it's part of my social, it has been part of my social life drinking. And, um, and it's been with me for years. I did quit in my early thirties. 

I quit for about five, six years and I didn't. Like, think about it all. Um, but once I became a mom, I don't know what happened. It's like, I started picking up, like, having a glass of wine. I'm not, like, a big hardcore liquor drinker. I, I liked my wine. And I noticed, too, when I had the kids, like, I really wanted to just, um, have a glass to get the, get to take the edge off. 

Like, and survive. Yeah. Because I was also, Unexpectedly, uh, on this chaotic ride of perimenopause unknowingly. And then once I started doing the research and my homework, I was like, Oh, this is where I'm at. And, um, it's definitely something that's very trending also in perimenopause is a lot of women breaking up with alcohol. 

There's a very huge number of women breaking up with alcohol. It's very hard. Um, I'm not here to either shame anyone who, you know, is a drinker. Uh, it's been part of my social, you know, environment, but I'm not here to shame myself either for choosing not to. And so I've had to, so with that said, I've had to create like habits and build my environment around like, I will say one significant thing is that my husband doesn't drink. 

My husband doesn't really care. Like if he had a rum and Coke at somebody's house, like, yeah, he's probably like, yeah, I just want to. tag along, but he doesn't care for liquor. He doesn't even really like wine. But it's, you know, and I did it for myself also because of the lack of sleep that came along that this unexpected ride that I'm still in, but it's, that has been a game changer, but I definitely had to. 

Yeah, I start looking into mocktails and enjoy my mocktails, which I actually do and, but I had to create an environment like I had to get rid of like a lot of things in my house so I wouldn't get tempted and all that to just say like I had to identify as a, I'm a non drinker. And that's fine. All things that you talked about, environment, identifying habits. 

And that's a huge sacrifice. Yeah. And you made a good valid point where it's like when you stop drinking and we're not here to shame anyone. Yeah. Like if you there's something exactly I'm not here to do that and I know that's not what you're doing, but you know alcohols everywhere Yeah, so when you decide to just no longer drink you realize holy crap. 

It's Everywhere you go. So for you to constantly have to be like dodging it. I do, you know, it's a dodge You know, and the reason I know that is because I did a 72 hour fast where I didn't eat any food, nothing. I remember when you said that. I just drank water for three days and I didn't, obviously I wasn't going to have alcohol. 

That was just three days. And I was like, the amount of like situations I found myself in those three days where alcohol was like, do you want a glass of wine? Do you want to drink? Right. And I was like, no, thank you. No, thank you. No, And I was like. No, Holy shit, that is, that's a lot, and it's only been three days. 

I can't imagine a year of having to dodge that. So I, I salute you for that. And, and for those people that, you know, hey, we're all coming from all walks of life, but if that's something that, you know, there's a lot of young people that actually, I know that they have decided to, that they don't want to drink. 

Yes. And good for you. That is a big movement in the young community. Because alcohol was huge in the Jackson. Yeah, it was everywhere. And it's a sober community now. Sober community. And what's funny is, is people that not necessarily are alcoholics, they don't, they never had a problem. It's not like they couldn't, it was just, they were like, I'm done, I don't want to do it anymore. 

Well, you know what? I'm just going to say, my daughters don't drink. My daughter's 23. She doesn't like it. Once in a while, if we go out and we're like in a nice restaurant, she may order like a little cocktail, but she, she's like, Oh, it doesn't, it wasn't like our time was like, Oh, we're going to turn up. 

We're going to get like, we did. It did. We did. And even culturally, I don't know about you, but like, Hey, my Latino, my Latin family. It's interesting how the sober community in this generation of young people. So good for you. That's great. If you've chosen not to. If that might be something right now that you're like, you know what? 

That's something that I've been wanting to implement as a habit. I will say as a tip is I'm in this journey of particularly I'm just focusing on the stopping to drink. I am not here to say, Hey, I'm going to stay sober for 10 years or for the rest of my life. Right. I did not. I removed that burden from myself because that was not working for me and that was not going to work for me. 

I just have identified as. I'm a non drinker. And And it was affecting your sleep because of your journey with perimenopause. Correct. So, if you don't mind, I have something here about, uh, Dr. Drop's truth bomb on alcohol and sleep during menopause and perimenopause. Do you mind if I say it, ladies? All right. 

I don't know any woman who's in her menopausal journey who is processing alcohol the way she used to. The tolerance seems to be going down. I'm excited to see some more research come out about this. But in my world, like I have to go in my personal experience, if I'm choosing to have a drink, I am choosing not to sleep. 

I'm gonna be up at 3, 2. 32, 3. 31, whatever it is, and it is like a bomb going off. Even one glass. And I have to make that choice. It's not worth it. If you're choosing to drink, you're choosing not to sleep. It really is that simple. That's beautiful. So, I wanted to share that because even though we are talking about Atomic Habits, I think the book helped you to make that decision to go back to the, our initial conversation. 

It's like. It's not that it was a bad habit, but it was a habit that needed to change for you to move forward in your new journey. And I commend you for that. Because that's a big one. Yes, it really is. And again, just as a reminder of the tip, you know, just like don't set this big goal of because as we were discussing and As James Clear discusses, it's not about the goal and that's one of, I mean, not, you know, I'm not trying to put together alcoholics, but their struggle is I'm living one day at a time. 

I'm living one day at a time. And that's really the, the point is like, Yeah, but for alcoholics, that one day of not drinking adds up to I've been five years sober. That's right. That's right. And that's, and that's a tiny habit that became a life changing habit going back to the book. Absolutely. And it could be anything. 

So it's an inspirational, uh, book about how the little things always end up being. The, the big things. So I wanted to talk about habit stacking. Um, if you ladies don't mind, let's explain to our listeners and our loyal listeners what habits, habit stacking is. And let's try and really like, I hate to use the word dumb it down, but let's just like really explain it as simple as possible so people can, if they're listening to the, to our show, hopefully they can incorporate this. 

Well, habit stacking is when you pair a new habit with an existing one. So you attach a new habit to something you already do. For example, like if you drink coffee every morning, use that as a trigger to do a quick stretch or meditation. So while my coffee is brewing, I'll meditate for 60 seconds. I'll pause and not, you know, think about anything, whatever the case is or like you said, um, when you wake up and brush your teeth, those are things that you normally do every day. 

Neutral. Yeah. Neutral. You just add something to it, positive, that you want to see change in. So if you want to start writing in a journal, okay, when I have my coffee, I'm going to take two minutes to write in my journal. And he says, don't, you know, we don't have to be, Oh, 30 minutes of writing, you know, that's a lot. 

So to start small, one minute of writing, 60 seconds, two minutes, but you start small and then eventually you're just not even going to be timing yourself. It's just going to be a habit and it's just going to happen and you know that every time I'm going to have my coffee, I'm going to sit down and write my journal and that's it. 

So that's what habit stacking is. I don't mean to interrupt you, but can those new habits that you're stacking become kind of like neutral at one point? Yeah. That's the goal. You keep doing it as, yeah. So it becomes a neutral habit for you. And then you replace it then with another one. Yeah. Yeah. It's genius. 

But he does say that you don't forget. Your old habits, right? You're just adding, you're just adding. Yeah. Something new. Yeah. I mean, I just remember too, it's um, but the habit stacking that there's, it might be a different part of the book, but it has to do with that kind of like a reward to like, oh, you're saying when you're saying like, okay, I'm going to make my coffee. 

And I'm gonna do the journaling, but what you should do is, is that, but maybe like take your journal stuff out, have it all prepared so it's there. Go make your coffee. Know that once I finish journaling, I'm gonna get to enjoy that coffee because the coffee is what you want. Right. So that's your habit that you're already doing. 

So you're incorporating a habit with it, but rewarding yourself for the habit that you really want because you have that habit already in place. So like. You could say, I'm not going to drink my coffee until I'm done journaling, or I'm going to set up my journaling, make my coffee, and then I'm going to go with my coffee and sit down and I'm going to journal and do both. 

Do you know what I mean? It's like a reward. Yeah. Yeah. I love that. I mean, he said it. He was like, you can't snap your fingers. and change into someone else is the tiny habits that'll get you to and that's I mean the whole entire book is like that but he does go into like like literally he does sketches he has excels he's like go to this so that's why you know I really hope that people give it a chance and read it I mean it is. 

How many books were sold? 10 million. I think it was like 10 million books were sold up. Because it's about habits, but it really can go for any habits. So don't, you're not going to read the book. Like it's not specific for like, Oh, you want to, you know, like we were talking about stop drinking or you want to work out or you it's for anything that you want to do anything. 

And it gives you examples. of stories. He does give examples like how we're giving examples and then he gives you steps exactly how to do these things. Yeah. And you incorporate whatever it is you need to incorporate into his steps. But it's, it's really good. Like, I just listened to it. I just finished listening to it this week. 

Because I have heard about it, I actually wanted to read it, but I couldn't find the time to really read the book, so I was like, okay, I'm like so curious about this, I'm just going to listen to it, and I'm like ready to like hit play and start all over again. I like really want to hear it again, and I want to get the book. 

Going back to the habit stacking, this is so simple and silly, but like, One of the things that I really wanted to be more diligent about is flossing my teeth. I think he talks about that in the book and it's funny because I, that was me, because like one of my fears is like having like, uh, dental work done. 

Like, I'm just, I can't, no. No, but honestly, I'm not trying to make a joke, but that haunts me too. Yeah, my mom. My mom has had a lot of work done and it's, I'm like, no, and not be me, a cultural thing or whatever, or lack of education or money, but like a lot of people that I knew, I'm not saying you guys, but a lot of people I knew, you know, they grew up in poverty and they didn't go to the dentist and they didn't have dental work. 

So a lot of people that I knew when they were my age. In their 40s had already lost a lot of their teeth. And were struggling and putting on dentures. That's my mom. My mom has had to, a lot of dental work done. She's had to go like, you know, even cause, you know, how costly that is here. So my mom has had it done in her country. 

And I just see how much she's suffered with it. She's had, you know, just even issues within herself. Like, uh, self esteem stuff that has, you know, with your teeth. Of course. Um, and It's a big deal. Yeah, it's a big thing. So, I've always been concerned about that. And so, I wanted to be more diligent about flossing my teeth. 

Well, I'm going to tell you, I showed somebody, I shouldn't have done this, but I showed someone yesterday your headshot picture, which we will get to that another day. Oh my God, you're so funny. And she was like, I'm not going to say her name, but she was, she's a Gen Z, she's 21 and she was like, she has the most beautiful teeth. 

You do. You have a great smile. I will say that. And I looked at the picture and I was like, fuck, her teeth are really pretty. So I'm not trying to make a joke, but I feel like whatever you're doing is working because it's true. It's like those little things that you grew up with that are. You're, you grow up seeing these things and no, we have to take care of our teeth. 

And so what I did was I realized that I was I wasn't remembering to floss and this, again, it is that simple. Sometimes we make it so complicated, but it is this simple. My toothpickers were in my drawer, you know, all of them there, right next to, by my sink. And so I would open it up. But because they weren't in my sights. 

I would always, like, shoot, I forget. And my kids, too, like, they can floss, too, and I bought them these really cute, with different colors, so I make a game out of them. Like, oh, which one, which color you want? They're dinosaur looking. Oh, yeah, I would do those for the girls, yeah. Yeah, so I'm like, which color? 

So, I realized, too, that I would remember for them, and then, of course, forget myself, because I was like, I was like, wait a minute, why don't I just take this out of my drawer, something simple, put it by my toothbrush, change my environment, and I'm like, now it becomes like brushing my teeth and flossing. 

And my kids and I, we all do it together. Yeah, but that little thing ends up with you being 85 years old with your own teeth. That's a little thing. Thank you, Jane. That's what I want to be. Listen, I know we're laughing about it, but it's the truth. Oh, no. I'm with you. I'm with you. It's the truth. You're 85. 

When you're 85 the mirror, you'll be like, Todavía tengo mis dientes. It's a big deal. And not for nothing, but like, that's stuff that they ask you. Do you have dentures? Or do you have a bridge? You know, it's like your checkoff list, you know? Yes. And I, you know, I have all my teeth. I'm very close to my husband's parents. 

And his, his dad is, uh, he just turned 90, which he went to the party. What an amazing, beautiful, amazing party. And my mother in law is gonna turn 90, um, this May. May, I mean, incredible. Okay, so they're right there. Right, they're like a little under a year apart. And, um, of course, they're in their 90s, so let's have a little grace here. 

Sure. But, um, my mother in law has been struggling for the past, uh, I would say five years with mobility issues and stuff like that. And she told me, you know, one of the biggest mistakes I made, Jasmine, is I stopped walking. I used to walk in the neighborhood and then I stopped and then I, I, I, I just found myself like sitting more on the couch and she was like, I regret that. 

I should have, I should have always kept walking, even if it was less, but get up in the morning, put on my sneakers, go for that, you know, instead of, she used to go around the block maybe like 20 times. She goes, okay, maybe I couldn't do 20 times some more, but I could still do maybe five. She goes, I can't even walk from my kitchen to my bedroom without a walker. 

And she goes, and that happened because I know that I stopped walking. Those are things that stayed with me because I'm like, we're all going to get there. So I'm very careful about that. Like, I really want to take, I want it, my, my biggest fear is to become old and not be able to take care of myself. Yeah. 

Maybe it's because I see it more. Sure. But I really want, to me, that's something that I. Really want to take care of. Yeah, be living, like thriving. And thriving and healthy. That's like my word of like. I want to be healthy, you know, and. Thriving and thriving. And I got to put in the work now. So for you, it's alcohol. 

For me, it could be like, you know, exercising and walking more. And you know, I'm trying to, I like sugar for me, I barely eat it anymore. I realized I was a sugar addict. You know, and I was popping cookies and cakes and chips and sodas. So how did you help yourself? Like kind of, I'm going to tell you the truth. 

I mean, once my last daughter went off to college, I stopped buying snacks. Okay. You don't got no snacks. You got nothing to eat. That's how, no, that's how you do it. Cold turkey. My biggest problem is still like the diet sodas, like Diet Coke. I love, I'm addicted. I didn't know that. I didn't know that about you. 

Addicted. Okay. Actually, coke zero. But I have, I used to have, I don't, I'm so embarrassed, but it's the truth. I used to have three a day. I now have one a day and I, and I allow myself grace. I'm like, I have one a day and it's around the same time, around 6, 630. You can, you know, stack a habit there, you know, and, but it's like, listen, I'm little, but I cut out sugar. 

Like a lot, you know, I still have a little piece of cake here and there, like a little piece of chocolate, dark chocolate, you know, I still do it. But it was before it was like every day and I knew that's, that's an addiction and it's just as bad. Like people don't think sugar is that bad, but sugar is detrimental. 

So that's one thing I'm proud of that I've been able to change. That's good to share that. Thank you. I mean, because, you know, we all have our little things that we struggle with. Absolutely. Mine is cheese. Honestly, mine is cheese, too. Salt. For me, it's salt. It's not even sweet. Salt, for me. Salt, salt. Yeah. 

And then I try to tell myself, well, it's protein. It's okay. It's keto friendly. Yeah, it's keto friendly. Cheese is pro Cheese is not protein. Yes, it is. It is. Shut up. Yes, girl. It's protein. I'm gonna Google that shit. Okay. Wait, do not mess this up for Deibys. Cheese is protein. What do you mean? Just leave it there. 

Is cheese protein? It has some protein in it. It's not like Like meat and eggs. It's fat. There's got to be some protein in it. I don't think cheese is a great source of protein. Oh, calcium, but it's often high in saturated fat salt. This means eating too much can lead to high cholesterol and high blood pressure, increasing your risk. 

of cardiovascular disease. You don't remember the pyramid in school with the picture of the fish and the egg? There was cheese there. A black and yellow cheese. You're not supposed to reference that. I learned something new. That was so bad. What? And to our listeners. The pyramid. Oh, well, still. I remember it. 

Which they're saying now, like, they're just proteins. Not even. Yeah. Yeah. That's so funny. I said, I don't know how much protein is in it, but there's protein in it. It has some protein. That's some. Well, so then what's a habit you've tried to build, but found difficult to stick to? I think that's a good one. 

Me is the gym. Yeah. All right. I think that, that's, that's hard. It's the, with the workout. You know what it is? Maya is working out too. You know, from, and I wasn't, it wasn't, I was, oh my God, I was working out in 2020 like a beast. 2020? 2020, 2021, 2022. I was like, All up in there, , and then No, I was, I was all up in there. 

I was killing it, bro. I felt great. What were you doing? What wasn't I doing? I was jogging Peloton, running, uh. 

You were a big Orange Theory person at some point, right? I was in really good shape. You got a reward, didn't you get like a medal? Yeah, yeah, I did, I did half marathons. Did you get a medal? They give medals out there? Oh, no, no, no, not at OTF, but I did like, I did a lot of half marathons. Oh, they give certificates though. 

Oh, I had a certificate for reaching a certain amount of splat points. I loved OTF. That's good motivation, that's good. But, menopause, well I'm not in menopause, I'm in perimenopause, that shit hit me like a ton of bricks. That slapped me in the, when I turned 45, that's it, I, that's where I feel I am, 45 just kicked my ass. 

And weight gain, depression, I don't want to say depression, let me take that back but, Pretty darn close. Funk. You were in a funk. Yeah. Um, man, I can't even explain it. All the things that I, I was feeling, and this is getting way too personal, but it got so bad for me, guys, that if it wasn't for my husband hanging in there for me and being strong in our marriage, I, I, I probably would have left. 

Cause I was, and it wasn't that he did anything, he didn't do nothing. I was just mentally. Going fucking crazy and I was in a bad, bad place and, uh, I seeked help through hormone replacement therapy, which I really am an advocate for that. And I feel like that saved, not only saved me, but I feel like it saved my marriage. 

Yeah. We've talked about that. I definitely, my, my husband the same. Yeah. And I, I, I love him very much. And, uh, you know, Mike's been my rock and he's always just been like, I'm going to, you know, you said something just in one of our shows, um, Babe, I'm, I can only give 5 percent today or 10 percent and Mike was putting 90 percent for like a year, like straight up. 

I was in a really bad place, but now I'm better. And I feel like these vulnerable moments as women help other women. And these type of books, going back to Atomic Habits, like, you know, being able to incorporate the, the good things and trying to eliminate the bad things, they add up. Because you know what, too? 

We're, we're the Gen Xers. Like, we really want to, at the end of the day, we really do want to thrive. And I think, too, like, we're, we're changing the face of, um, what it is. Tap the second half of our lives. Yeah. You weren't supposed to talk about it. No. Be quiet. Know they got in trouble. I don't have, honestly, a lot of information from my own mom, unfortunately. 

Yeah. You know, and she's, she's honest about it, but she really doesn't have a lot of information to provide for me, so I'm just super grateful. Mm-hmm. That there is information out there. Yeah. And that we are the GenXers, we're the advocates for ourselves. We're like, no, we're not taking no for an answer. 

No. That's not enough for us. No, we need answers. We need, uh, options and I love, love, love the movement that we're involved in. Yeah, I do too. Yeah, I agree with that because going back to that one episode, I won't get too much into it, but when we did the infertility. about me not knowing what was going on and I wasn't feeling well and I was. 

I was my own advocate. I was like, nope, I'm not, I'm looking for answers. Nope. I'm not just, you're not just going to give me a pill because I have migraines. Oh, you're not just going to tell me to do this. And it's like, we need to find out what's going on. And it's like, I wasn't. Giving up it was was like I need an answer. 

I need an answer. I want an answer I want an answer And it's like not giving up for certain things and for you and I feel like how you said like my mom Doesn't have information. She'll talk to me about it she's open with me now about things not that she wouldn't be before but You didn't talk about that stuff. 

No, you didn't. You didn't. Now that I'm a woman and she's older, like, I can, I talk to her about it, but there's no information. Like, there's nothing really. Even the face of our generation and where we're at in the second half of our lives is not the same. No. Like, look at Demi Moore. I mean, obviously she's an actress, but like, to be honest with you, and I'm going to say something. 

Like. I, up until just a few years ago, I was like, am I going to need to cut my hair when I turn 50? Oh, I talked about that the other day on TikTok. Oh my, honestly, I thought about that because I was like, but I love me, my hair, this, no, your hair. Yeah, I thought about that. I was like, I was like, Oh my gosh, am I going to need to cut my hair? 

Like, what kind of 50 year old am I going to, me, me, I love, like I see Demi Moore. I'm like, she is so beautiful long hair. I have friends that are in their fifties and I see them and I'm like. They look badass and I'm like, no, I'm like, I love me how I am. It's funny because it is like that they're like, I've heard older women talked about that three days ago. 

So, I mean, but it's true. I had a friend, I have conversations like that. I'm so passionate about that because I love my long hair. Me too. Me too. It's part of my identity. I'm trying to grow it even longer now. I'm like, I regret cutting your hair. Jessica, I had a friend tell me, Jasmine, you need to cut your hair because You know you're an older woman now. 

Oh my God. You're gonna make me cry, Nicole. It's not true, mom. I was just like, it's not true, girl. No, but these are conversation. These are thoughts. These are thoughts that women have. But when she an older woman, she was my age. No, I know. No. So she didn't mean it in a bad way. I hear you. She's a dear friend. 

Probably the same way of how I'm thinking about how we were raised. Right. Once. Right. And I just. I just love my hair so much and I like half of my TikToks are on do it yourself. Yeah, I love them. Do it yourself highlights how to do like, it's literally like half my content is about my hair and so many women literally will tell me. 

You inspire me to, like, let my hair grow out because everyone says I'm too old and I'm in my fifties. I don't believe that. And they're like, the rules are changing. You can have long hair. But I always thought people were cutting their hair because it was easier. No. Not because they were old. Short hair is harder. 

I will tell you, for me, it's cultural. It's just because once you reach a certain age, you have to have shorter hair. It's always been there. And I'm like, no, my hair is Like, I wanna have it like up to here. Yeah. I want it to my waist. I love, I can't, I like, I like squishing it to the sexy. Sexy. I like putting it in a braid. 

I like putting it in a bun. Me too. Ponytail. And, and I feel sexy in it. Yeah. Like it's part of my identity. It's part of, I was just gonna say that my hair is part of me. It's part of my accessory. . Yes. It's, it's like, you know, it's me. To me, hair is like, hair is. So like, that's when you have a good hair day. 

Your whole day. Nobody can piss you off. You're like, bitch, my hair. There's no humidity out. Big thing for women. And I'm like, I'm not going to cut my hair because I'm going to be 49. No, I'm going to let my hair long. I like it like that. I'm going to keep it like that. I just think it's a style thing. I'm so happy we brought it up. 

Yeah, I think it's a style thing. Whatever. Don't cut your hair. No, don't. Unless you want to. Unless you want to. Unless you want to. There's people that'll cut, cause like that, like I said, they don't want to deal with the long hair. Yeah, that's what I was gonna say. That's a different version. That's a different reason. 

That's a different reason. Yeah. Of course. If you want to cut your hair because you want to, that's up to you. But if you're cutting it because you think you have to and you don't want to, don't do that. It's a thing. It's a thing. No way. And like, I have gray hair and I don't want to be all gray. I don't. So I keep dyeing my hair and it's not because. 

I don't think other women look gorgeous, all gray. That's beautiful, but that's not for me, girl. You don't like, no. That's what I was just going to say. You're so young. You're not a Latina, babe, but I don't know about that right now. My mom is 85, and her hair is brown, thick and luscious. It's short, you know. 

But, um, my mom's like, no, no, that's one thing, like, you have to, and I'm like, I'm not ready for that. I don't think I'll ever be ready for that. And I think that's okay. Yeah. And that's okay. Just like some women think that they can pull off the gray hair and they can, just like someone can pull off the short hair and someone can pull off the long, all of it. 

It's, it depends on you, your style, what you can pull off. Everybody can't pull off the same look. And that's a good habit. Yeah. That's a good habit. To have in your life. That's right. That's right. That's it. Going back to the book. Cause you know, we always get off track. Listen, we're very passionate about our hair, okay? 

I think we touched on some really, you know, we talked about very touchy subject. Don't cut the hair. Sorry, I had to bring it up because it was like. Mira, when you said that, I was like, Oh my, we're connected. We're connected. We're saying, we're saying, we're like, we're a girl's girl. We're a girl's girl. I'm sure. 

I'm a girl's girl. No, no, I know you are. No, no. I'm just saying all of us, we're a girl's girl. No, like, we're a girl's girl. Like, we got your back. Like, you don't want to cut your hair? Cut your hair. Okay. I love how Monica said that. She's like, I'm a girl's girl. I know you are, girl. You're my ride or die. 

Ride or die. You're always a girl's girl. I wanted to talk about one thing that he said in the book that I thought was a great idea for multiple reasons. He said something like, say that you don't want to eat out anymore. You want to cut that habit. So you open up a bank account and you name it, like say that you want to go on a trip or you really want this leather jean jacket that you're like dying for. 

So every time that you go to eat, you control yourself and you're like, you know what, babe, we're not going to go eat. So we would have spent what, like 25 in this meal. Right now you transfer 25 from your checking into that savings account and you name the savings account. You can name the savings account like. 

Leather jacket or trip to like a reward. Cancun, right? That's like the reward. So, and then, and I'm like, that's a good way just to say for anything, like it is, but it's like cutting out the habit with the reward. So he has like these certain steps. That's a good one. Yeah. Monica and Jessica have read the book more than I have, but I remember that part. 

So I don't know if you guys can remember more of like how he talks about the cue, the crave it, the response, the reward, things like that. Well, you brought up also the cues. Yeah. Like, being able to, like, put things within your day of, like, to motive, to kind of remind you. Well, it's, it's the, the four laws of behavior change. 

Right. So, the Q is you make it obvious. Mm hmm. So, like, you leave your work shoes out, where you can Like, your workout shoes, where you can see them. You make it obvious. Yeah, like, take the, the floss. Right. Toothpickers. Yeah. Craving. You make it attractive. So you link the habit to something you already enjoy. 

Okay. Right. I think that's important. That's a key thing because you don't want to do something like you gotta force yourself to do. Right. Right. That sucks. The response. Um, you make it easy. Don't overcomplicate it. Yeah, it's overthinking it, right? Like we were saying, Oh, you want to do 20 pushups. You don't have to start with 20. 

Just just incorporate the habit with like two, five pushups, right? Yeah. And then the reward, you make it satisfying. Give yourself a reason to keep going. Yeah, that's wonderful. I really love it. Be a reason to keep going. Like what would be something for you guys? I mean, when she's, I mean, I'm going to try to find one, but when I hear her say that, it makes me think of like the coffee situation. 

We said like, I'm going to journal. I want to incorporate journaling, but I love my coffee. And like, that's my reward. I wake up and that's what drives me to go downstairs. And so you're rewarding yourself with the coffee. You're just interrupting it with the habit of like, okay, I'm going to journal and I'm going to make my coffee while I have my books and set it up. 

Make it, you know, attractive. Have the table with your stuff looking all cute. Pretty, maybe get a pretty pen. You know what I mean? Like, make it fun. Um, and then like your reward is your coffee. Okay, I get to sit down. I'm going to journal. My reward is I get to enjoy my coffee. Like you don't have the coffee unless you journal with it. 

Yeah. You know, I have this, I have like my nightstand. So I was not doing good with like reading books. And so then I realized, I looked at my nightstand, I was like, Well, I have 20 books there on my nightstand. Yeah, yeah. No wonder. Yeah, no wonder I'm not getting anything at any reading time. I moved all that out. 

And then I basically have like my one book that I'm focused on right now. And I have this cute little night. light, book, book, light, light. And I've had other book lights before. This is again, so simple and silly. I've had other book lights before and they were all battery operated. And I was like, I need a USB book light. 

I ended up buying like four. Then I gave one to my mom. She's a book. She's a big book reader. Do you give them with the book? I know, I know, right? I'm like to get like a little package and I, and it's a USB one and I kid you not, I've had it for like over a year and a half and it's my little book and it's like all messed up and stuff, but that's my little nightlight. 

I have no excuse and I take it out, I put it, I have all this in my nightstand drawer, but I take that out, I put my reading glasses out and this is like part of my nighttime routine. Do do do, do do do. Yeah, you make it attractive. I'm a nerd, I'm a nerd when it comes to like little things, but I like put all that there. 

I have everything ready right there in my nightstand, my journal, so I can journal. And I see it, like what you were saying, it's like I'm creating my environment and I'm giving myself like little cues of like, right, okay, we're going to read. So now when you go lay down, it's like, it looks attractive, it looks pretty. 

And I love organizing as it is, and I love decorating as you guys know. Yes. So when I was reading the book, I was like, I like that. this because I like the whole prepping and making it attractive and setting up the whole like, you know, you're staging, you know, that Deb for for red lips. I'm gonna I'm gonna put something on you. 

I think that you underestimate how you can take something and make it so beautiful. And maybe doing that you do know you and you're passionate about it. So maybe you could like start doing 30 second videos or like 45 second videos of incorporating this passion that you have on the side. You are reading. 

And then we could put it on our Instagram page or TikTok so people get to see like another side of Deibys. I will. I was doing it. I have to pick it back up. So I'm going to, I'm going to do it. I'm going to start sharing little things. I mean, there'll be like simple little things, but it's like, it excites me. 

Like, yeah, the other day, um, for you. You had mentioned that before. And the other day I cleaned out my pantry and I didn't do the before photo and I was so mad because I was like, well now I can't show the after photo because now it just looks like a drawer I put snacks in. Right, right. But I like took everything out, I took the dust buster and vacuumed it. 

good? Oh my God, it feels so good. I open that pantry, I don't know how many times. Cleaning up the refrigerator and then it's all beautiful. My little one is like me though, because she came back and goes, Are you done? I go, Yeah. She goes, Let me see. At the refrigerator. And then I tried to do, um, cause I recently heard like stop using the drawers. 

for the vegetables and the fruit, like put it on this, which I do put on the shelf, but I tend to like stuff the drawers and then that actually, I was like, you know what, I'm not putting anything in the drawer. My onions were in the drawer, but like, I'm like, I'm putting the carrots and the celery in the straw. 

So I like organized the refrigerator. I cleaned the shelves all that same day cause I went grocery shopping. And then again, Jasmine, you did the refrigerator too. And she opens it. She's like, wow, like she's like me and she does it in her room. It's like, it's so cute, but yeah, I love that stuff. I don't know what it is. 

I just, I love that stuff. That's wonderful. I think that's great. I mean, I, I just think everything that we're sharing and if, you know, our listeners are listening is like, we're just regular women who just want to inspire our community. And I hope that you, uh, give this book a chance, um, I think you're going to be pleasantly surprised. 

Yes, it's highly recommended. Yes. I can't wait to read it again. So I think now would be a really good time to bring up the next book that I'm really excited about having a Red Lips Real Talk Book Club. Um, the second book that I think we should read, I'm excited to read. And if you would like to join in reading this book and then we'll have another podcast to discuss it. 

Jessica, go ahead. It's called Brooke Shields is Not Allowed to Get Old. And neither are we. So don't cut your hair if you don't want to. No girl. No, but I think this is a great book. I saw it at Target and I was like, I want to read that book so bad. So we're definitely going to read that and we'll have a podcast to discuss that great book by the beautiful Brooke Shields. 

Thank you so very much for listening to us today. I hope we've been able to inspire you. Thank you. Thank you for joining us. And we look forward to seeing some new members in our book club. Yeah. And let us know if you read the book and your thoughts on it. And if you'd like to leave us some comments, trust me, people have been leaving us more comments and it really, really makes our day. 

Yeah. It does. I was like, I'm so excited. Every time somebody leaves us a comment, it means more to us than you know. And we appreciate you. So thank you. Thank you. Y hasta la proxima. Thank you for listening. Make sure to subscribe to our show so you don't miss an episode. We will be dropping an episode every two weeks. 

Oh yeah. No, like seriously. Subscribe now. So just chill. Till the next episode. Follow us on Insta and TikTok. Bye.